I remember with remarkable clarity the most significant and the most inconsequential things.
The moment I lost my place in a song while singing in front of 1200 people. The way the scrambled eggs were served chopped in tiny, fluffy pieces at the hotel Rod and I stayed in the first time I went to visit him in Brazil. Walking barefoot on hot coals at a Tony Robbins seminar in the 90s. The glossy chestnut color of the wood-paneled walls in my college American Literature class. My father’s last breath.
If you ask my brother and my best friend (who’ve known me for just about forever), they would likely tell you my memory of events that are crystal clear to them is spotty at best and completely nonexistent much of the time. It’s kind of weird how many things they remember that I don’t. I attribute much of that to how frequently I live in my head, thoughts drifting someplace other than where I am right here and right now.
It’s easy to understand why I’d remember the moments filled with heart-racing fear and devastating loss so clearly. But why the eggs?
In her book, It’s About Time: Finding Magic, Power, and Ease in Your Life, Leslie Keenan teaches that there are three kinds of time: Linear, Natural, and Spiritual.
Linear time is masculine, it is the realm of the mind, it moves in one direction- forward.
Natural time is feminine, it is the realm of the body, it is cyclical time. It is something I talk about often. The realm of the moon and the seasons.
Spiritual time is neither masculine nor feminine, neither mind nor body. Spiritual time is whole in and of itself.
I am in spiritual time when I am fully present. Awake. Aware. Alive.
In grief. In love. In awe. In. This. Moment.
When I am in Spiritual Time, I know it. And I remember. And even when it hurts or terrifies me, nothing matters more. And there is no place I’d rather be.
(Ok, we could dive deep into that stage fright moment and discuss whether fear isn't actually being fully present at all but, that is a great conversation to have round the fire sometime late in the evening. I hope we get to do that someday.)
We spend a lot of time pushing forward to get somewhere (where?), to achieve something, accomplish something, get something done. We (especially women) spend a tremendous amount of time doing the Sisyphean, cyclical tasks of daily life- dishes, laundry, childcare, meal prep, repeat.
But how often are we living in Spiritual Time? And, perhaps more importantly, how can we go there regularly and on purpose?
Ten years ago when I first started holding my annual fall retreat with Anjali Budreski at Sky Meadow in Vermont, I couldn’t have known that this one annual event would become the strongest thread in the tapestry of a new spiritual life of my own design that I have been weaving since childhood. It is what led me to look deeply into why this time of year and being on retreat feels so important to my well-being. It has taught me the critical importance of creating and holding sacred space for women. It sparked my intense curiosity for cyclical living, magic, and ritual. And it feels like coming home to my soul, each and every year.
Even though we can’t be at Sky Meadow in person this year, Anjali and I have created a beautiful and magical container of sacred space for you that we can’t wait to share at our online Earth Magic for Uncertain Times Retreat on November 6-8. Registration is open and we’ve designed it to be flexible and affordable so that you can sign up for the retreat and come for all five of the weekend events or just pop in for however many meet your schedule and your needs.
I hope you will consider joining us. More importantly, however you choose to create and experience Spiritual Time for yourself, I hope you will make it a non-negotiable part of your self-care.
And, if as part of your Spiritual Time, you are following along with our 40 Days of Autumn Magic, here is more of the magic behind the guide for you.
The Extra Boost of Magic behind Days 15-21 of the Guide- Spiral Deeper with Us
Let's dive into a few of the secrets behind the guide that will help you understand why Days 15-21 of our 40 Days of Autumn Magic are designed to align perfectly with the season and with the moon phases to give you an extra boost of magic as we journey deeper into Autumn together.
On Days 15 through 21 (October 6 to 12, 2020), the moon is waning from her full moon state and moving towards a darkening phase. We are moving away from the energy of connection, visibility, and release and into a phase of focus and completion. This is a beautiful time to allow yourself to focus on details and finishing projects to create space for rest next week when we enter a dark, new moon phase.
On Days 15 and 16, the moon is in the air sign of Gemini, a sign of COMMUNICATION and THINKING. We are tuning into our connection to the mind in its messenger incarnation. A deeper inquiry on these days could be, how do I feel called to use my voice to communicate right now to help me focus and complete what I need to get done?
On Days 17, 18, and 19, the moon is in the water sign of Cancer, a sign of FEELING. We are working with the nurturing water energy of emotion and sensitivity during this phase of the waning moon and it may bring up feelings that you need to allow yourself to experience. An opportunity for deeper inquiry here may be to ask yourself- how am I feeling about the shorter days and colder weather? What would feel most nurturing to me right now?
On Days 20 and 21, the moon is in the fire sign of Leo, a sign of LEADERSHIP. We may be feeling more self-confident and magnetic but also drawn towards the more introverted call of the darkening moon. This could be an interesting combination of energies to play with and a deeper inquiry now could be, how can I honor a call to lead and still honor my need to rest?
Remember that while the moon moves through the astrological signs every two and a half days, shifting the energy and influences, it is in a phase of focus and completion and is moving towards a phase of rest for these seven days of our journey as it releases away from the full moon and grows darker. It is a beautiful time to gather our energy for a final burst of gentle productivity, with a focus on balance and beauty in this Libra season of Autumn Harvest.
Check back next week for a deeper dive into Days 22-28 of the guide as we continue to slow down and move towards the darker days of late autumn.